Apparently, you can’t be purtty without a doctor’s help.

April 18, 2008

These are the days when plastic surgery gets free advertising from tons of beauty tv shows and magazines dedicated to it. Even fictional dramas – aka nip Tuck – tell you the key to self esteem is thru a li’l self mutilation. Get a doctor’s help to make you better than you are. Today’s version of the Bionic woman or the Six Million dollar Man is not through improved strength or incredible sensory perception. It’s about looking good.

Yesterday, I was an unwitting victim of advertising this new path to the fountain of youth. I was standing in line at a drug store, and as I am want to do, I picked up a magazine to take home with me. The cover said “Our biggest before and after makeover section ever!” I’m a sucker for those before and afters, I have to tell you, but my version is seeing someone get out of their highschool haircut and finally learn how to put on that eye shadow. I was not ready for the magazine I bought.

It’s called New Beauty, and it is 100% (200ish pages!) about getting doctors to suck your face in, suck your fat out, cut it, tuck it, lift it, pad it, whatever it takes to look good. Rather than feeling motivated and inspired to follow these “simple guidelines” to retaining my youth, I felt totally depressed.

I felt a little better after I ate a fudgsickle though.

Stumble it!

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